This review is transcluded from Talk:Eric Hacker/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Zepppep ( talk · contribs) 18:08, 30 September 2012 (UTC) reply

• I will be reviewing the article.

• It may be difficult, but not impossible, for the article to be expanded, as the subject's major league experience is rather limited and so far, notability reasons concerning his minor league career aren't evident, but nevertheless, expansion is needed. It is not broad in its coverage.
• The lead lacks details to how many years he spent in the minors and when he made his major league debut. The section also mentions much of his feats/stats whilst in the minors, yet according to the article, this seems unwarranted as the mentions (as worded) don't pass notability requirements as seen here.

Would denote the length with a years range, rather than "seven seasons." Also, the year of his MLB debut isn't specified so the reader isn't sure which year is being referenced in the lead. Zepppep ( talk) 09:16, 2 October 2012 (UTC) reply

• The "High school" section contains only two sentences (one of which is about football). Additionally, there are grammar/ WP:MoS concerns throughout this small section and the article at large ("double-A," "triple-A", innings represented with fractions rather than decimal points, "1 strikeouts," etc.). Also, in this section, the state in which the subject's high school is not mentioned.

I fixed the abbreviations for A, AA, and AAA. However, the innings are supposed to be represented with fractions so non-baseball fans will understand they do not mean three-and-one-tenth innings. Also, clicking on the high school will reveal to the reader which state it is located in. Sanfranciscogiants17 ( talk) 23:18, 30 September 2012 (UTC) reply

I thought it was to be decimals only, but I can't find a reference for that. I see one FA with decimals, another with fractions, so for now will let it slide. The state definitely needs to be specified. Zepppep ( talk) 03:37, 1 October 2012 (UTC) reply

"1 strikeouts" isn't just incorrect because of noun-verb disagreement, but because numbers less than 10 should be written out in prose (see: Wikipedia:Manual of Style/Dates and numbers#Numbers. So "1 strikeout" still needs to be dealt with. Zepppep ( talk) 09:09, 2 October 2012 (UTC) reply

I believe it should either appear as "Class AA" or "Double-A", but not simply "AA." Zepppep ( talk) 09:16, 2 October 2012 (UTC) reply

• The "NYY" subsection is misleading, as the subject appears to not have played a single game with the club. If he was in their farm system, that is different from playing on the big league team or being on the big league team's 25-man roster.

Rather than simply adding "organization" to the subsection heading, might recommend headings or organization of the article which denote "Minor league career." I realize he has drifted back and forth between the minors when as a member of other clubs, but again, he never appeared on the 25-man roster or played a game for NYY. Zepppep ( talk) 09:16, 2 October 2012 (UTC) reply

When a player is in the minor leagues, his Wikipedia article states that he is in the team's organization in the lead; however, if you would prefer, I could change organization to minor leagues in the Yankees' header. Because Hacker has spent so much of his career in the minors, I think minor league career or a different organization of the article would just make it more confusing. Sanfranciscogiants17 ( talk) 11:28, 2 October 2012 (UTC) reply

• Zepppep ( talk) 18:08, 30 September 2012 (UTC) reply

I have addressed the first wave of changes. Sanfranciscogiants17 ( talk) 11:28, 2 October 2012 (UTC) reply

• I'd organize it as "Minor league career," and then "Major League career." Yes, he does go back and forth between majors and minors but again, the meatiest part of the article would be clearly laid out to the reader under "minors" as he played in the minors only for several years. It's not at all uncommon for a pro baseball player's pre-major league career to be in its own section. It's a suggestion.

I understand what you're saying, but usually when a pro baseball player's pre-major league career is in its own section, the player has spent more time in the majors than Hacker says. I think the organization needs to remain where it is right now. Sanfranciscogiants17 ( talk) 11:31, 8 October 2012 (UTC) reply

• lead: "he returned to the Giants"; did he return to the majors, or in fact, the Giants?

• "2002-2009" use endashes to separate
• "American" should be linkable
• can get rid of "Previously,..."
• "minor league system" minor league should be linkable upon first mention

• HS: his senior season of baseball is mentioned before his senior year of football, although most likely the latter occurred first

• Would strongly recommend expansion of this section, or consider merging this with minor section

• personal life details, such as his wife's name, should probably be referenced Zepppep ( talk) 21:06, 8 October 2012 (UTC) reply

• NYY org: "Class AAA" should be linkable upon first mention

• Same goes for Class A and Class AA upon first mention Zepppep ( talk) 21:06, 8 October 2012 (UTC) reply

• Pirates: "August 3-9" endash

• "triple-A" should be capitalized, or rather, to be consistent with other markup present in article, be "Class AAA" Zepppep ( talk) 21:06, 8 October 2012 (UTC) reply

• Twins: "outrighted off..." explain this to the reader, assuming their knowledge of baseball or pro sports is quite limited

• This should probably go in the Pirates section (or wherever it is used first) Zepppep ( talk) 21:06, 8 October 2012 (UTC) reply

• second stint: "103 walks, and 43 walks" probably mean "strikeouts" for one of those

• It appears this section goes from majors, to minors, to majors. If he went to the majors that season and never pitched again with the Giants during the season, I would give his majors season stats next to his majors' details. For the 26 appearance with Fresno, the league in which he was fourth in a stat in should be re-mentioned.

• Stats have not been updated, or at least shown to reflect through '2012 season' Zepppep ( talk) 21:06, 8 October 2012 (UTC) reply
• I see PCL is explained upon first mention, with an accompanying abbreviation. However, "PCL" is used multiple times until this same paragraph, where it's full text version is used. Zepppep ( talk) 21:06, 8 October 2012 (UTC) reply

• Pitching style: it appears the Black comment comes after one performance. I would be hesitant to draw conclusions about a pitcher's style from one game. Zepppep ( talk) 21:06, 8 October 2012 (UTC) reply

Removed most of the Black quote; however, I left in the part about Hacker's delivery because a pitcher's delivery does not change much from game to game. Sanfranciscogiants17 ( talk) 11:25, 9 October 2012 (UTC) reply

• I'm not going to be super strict re: refs, considering this is GAN. However, 1) date format should be consistent throughout, 2) ref #34 should mention the agency (Associated Press) and it appears the date is position differently than other refs of the same type, #20 has an incorrect title and the author is missing, 3) if it's going to be listed, might as well be correct: Major League Baseball is not the publisher of such articles, but rather Major League Baseball Advanced Media, I believe. [1] Zepppep ( talk) 21:06, 8 October 2012 (UTC) reply
• General comments: this article contains one quote. There are 3 sections which contain quite little information, and if they're not expanded, should be incorporated into the article. The info box could be updated (or shown to be updated) thru 2012 season.

Zepppep ( talk) 06:09, 8 October 2012 (UTC) reply

Second wave of changes addressed. Sanfranciscogiants17 ( talk) 11:31, 8 October 2012 (UTC) reply

Third wave of changes addressed. Sanfranciscogiants17 ( talk) 11:25, 9 October 2012 (UTC) reply

• "He made his major league debut with the Pirates on September 22, 2009, and pitched in three games for them." Suggest "...and pitched in three games for them that season", or perhaps "...and pitched in three games for them on the season" or three career games/appearances with the club.
• "Giants" is mentioned three times in consecutive sentences in the lead. Needs a little word variety.
• His current home mention should come later in that section. The timing seems a bit confusing as it's written now.
• Redundant to mention he was 1) born in Duncanville, 2) went to Duncanville HS "in Duncanville." The reader can probably get the point that the HS is Duncanville.
• "on the football team" &ndash which football team?
• the "former major leaguers" mention of his HS seems a bit trivial, especially considering there is so little information about his HS baseball career in the article. Look to expand the HS section. Look to expand his early life section. I would also try to find a source which mentions why he ultimately decided baseball over football.
• The 2005 complete game ranking amongst other pitchers is a bit trivial (his placement in the league of CBs is not particularly noteworthy, and also, the reader is unlikely to have any idea just how many pitchers played in the league that year). Would probably just mention along with his other '05 stats that he recorded on complete game.
• Not sure I would combine his minor league totals for 2007 (IL and FSL can't really be considered comparable). Just leave the stats separate for each league.
• What does the Gardenhire quote mean, exactly? A "long guy." A reader with little baseball background might not be sure what this means.
• There are a few mentions where his stats in one league seems to the reason the he was promoted to a higher league. If this was in fact the reason, a reference needs to be added, otherwise it's speculative to say the reason he finished with XX stats was the reason for his being promoted. He might've been promoted because of injuries to the higher league team, or for any number of reasons. If you can't find a source that states why he was promoted, then I would just mention his stats and then that he was promoted, without any speculation on why he was promoted.
• Quotes more than 40 words are to be indented.
• After his call-up quote in the PIT