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This one looks like it's been gathering dust. Doing it
JOEBRO64 22:14, 3 October 2018 (UTC)reply
Comments:
It... follows a comparable story of Japanese youth exploring paranormal urban legends in their neighborhood. This doesn't really make sense to me—how is it comparable? Also this isn't mentioned in prose.
I just removed the word cuz it's not really needed. What I mean is, the story about Japanese youth exploring rumors in their neighborhood is comparable to the narratives in Twilight Syndrome.
first collecting rumors at the school and then later investigating them in city. Typo—should be "in the city."
Done
IIRC the use of "very" is discouraged, as it's unneeded to express the point (horror was popular and horror games were popular)
Done
... including some involved with Twilight Syndrome, and decided to develop another horror game borrowing the former series' gameplay system. I don't think "former" is needed here—there's no other series it could be referring to.
Done
Upon release, Famitsu scored it at 26/40. ...and that's it? I feel like you should explain Famitsu's thoughts about the game; looking at the source they're present.
I added more. It's too bad Famitsu doesn't post the full reviews.
Just a few issues, otherwise this is a great little read.
JOEBRO64 11:43, 5 October 2018 (UTC)reply