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Reviewer:
Kyle Peake (
talk ·
contribs ) 09:51, 20 July 2020 (UTC)
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For review beginning later today, though may take over a day --
Kyle Peake (
talk ) 09:51, 20 July 2020 (UTC)
reply
Infobox and lead
Do not use hlist; replace with bullet points
Target pop to
Pop music
"song, "Different Colors" is lyrically" → "song, it is lyrically"
"released to
alternative radio stations" → "released to US
alternative radio stations"
Move this sentence to being the second of this para instead
Target music critics to
Music journalism
"with many of them commenting on its chorus" → "with many of them praising its
chorus " with the appropriate target
"top ten hit on the" → "top ten track on the"
"for the song, featuring footage of the group touring with colorful visuals, was released on June 11, 2015." → "for the song was released on June 11, 2015, featuring footage of the band touring with colorful visuals."
"has been performed live a number of times by the band, including at
award shows like the" → "was performed live by Walk the Moon at award shows, including the"
"It was included in the setlist of" → "It was included on the setlist for"
"was used in campaigns for" → "was used in campaigns of"
Done
ThedancingMOONpolice (
talk ) 06:42, 22 July 2020 (UTC)
reply
Background and composition
"of "Different Colors", which has" → "of "Different Colors", featuring" on the audio sample main text
Wikilink
pre-chorus to itself per
MOS:LINK2SECT
The first sentence in prose belongs in the Release and reception section instead and should mentioned that it was released as the opening track; rewrite to something concise on those lines
"It was written by all four members of the band and was recorded" → ""Different Colours" was written by all four members of Walk the Moon, while recorded"
Target mixed to
Audio mixing (recorded music)
Target Mastering to
Mastering (audio)
Wikilink
Sterling Sound to itself
[3][5][6] should all be solely at the end of the sentence in this order since it is only three refs
"It is composed of lots of ebullient synths and consists of" → "The song is composed of numerous ebullient
synths , and features" with the target
Wikilink
pre-chorus to itself
"to "create a weird," → "because he wanted to "create a weird," for specifying since this reads confusingly with the explanation sentence next
"and are meant to support the" → "and are intended to show support for the"
"It was also created to help" → "It was also used to help"
"stated that the song is addressed to" → "stated that the song addresses"
"by saying "it shows a" → "by saying that "it shows a"
"a chance for [the band] to" → "a chance for [Walk the Moon] to"
"talking about the inspiration for the track," → "talking about the inspiration for "Different Colors","
"how he was frustrated that news segments" → "being frustrated that news segments"
"and wanted "to write" → "and that the band "to write"
Done
ThedancingMOONpolice (
talk ) 06:42, 22 July 2020 (UTC)
reply
Release and reception
"pre-orders of Talking Is Hard on" → "pre-orders of Talking Is Hard via"
"The song was also made available for
steaming " → "Simultaneously, the song was made available for
streaming "
"It impacted
alternative radio stations" → "It impacted US
alternative radio stations"
Remove wikilink on extended play
"on December 4, 2015,[16] which" → "on December 4 of that year, which" moving [16] to the end of the sentence
"of "Different Colors" done by
Lost Kings and
The Griswolds ," → "of "Different Colors", done by
Lost Kings and
the Griswolds , respectively." per
MOS:THEMUSIC
"a cover of" → "The EP also features a cover of" as this should now be a new sentence
"by
The Isley Brothers , and" → "by
the Isley Brothers , and"
"were donated to the" → "were set to be donated to the"
"received mostly positive reviews from music critics." → "was met with mostly positive reviews from
music critics ." with the target
"indie rock" in his review of Talking Is Hard." → "indie rock"." since that is off topic
"and that it "is bound to" → "and it "is bound to"
Target Vulture to
Vulture.com
"about the song, writing that the track" → "towards the song, writing that it"
"but mentioned that its chorus "is probably" → "but called the chorus "probably"
"The reviewer noted that the" → "The staff of the publication noted that the"
Should the list be in speech marks?
I see music lists being in speech marks like ones on
this article .
Done all other fixes.
ThedancingMOONpolice (
talk ) 06:42, 22 July 2020 (UTC)
reply
Commercial performance
"In the United States, "Different Colors" debuted at number 36 on
Billboard 's " → ""Different Colors" debuted at number 36 on the US
Billboard "
Target Alternative Songs to
Alternative Airplay
"third top ten hit on the chart." → "third top ten hit on the Alternative Songs chart."
"It spent a total of 20 weeks" → "The song spent a total of 20 weeks"
"on the Alternative Songs 2015 year-end chart." → "on the US Alternative Songs year-end chart for 2015."
Wikilink
Rock Airplay to itself
"on the week ending October 30, 2015," → "for the issue date of October 30, 2015,"
"On the
Hot Rock Songs chart," → "On the US
Hot Rock Songs chart,"
"and also logged 20 weeks there." → "and also logged 20 weeks on the chart."
"On the week ending December 25, 2015," → "For the issue dated December 25, 2015,"
Wikilink
Hot Singles Sales to itself
"at number three following the release" → "at number three, following the release"
Wikilink
Canada Rock to itself
Done
ThedancingMOONpolice (
talk ) 06:49, 22 July 2020 (UTC)
reply
Music video
Retitle to Promotional videos, since not only is there more than one but a lyric video is not the same as a music video
"one of the landmarks in
Cincinnati featured" → "one of
Cincinnati 's landmarks featured" on the img main text
Wikilink
lyric video to itself; do this in prose too
"was filmed in the band's" → "was filmed in Walk the Moon's"
"This is Walk the Moon's" → "The visual stood as the band's"
"The official
music video , featuring" → "An accompanying
music video , featuring"
"Directed by Nathan Crooker and Patrick Nichols," → "It was directed by Nathan Crooker and Patrick Nichols."
"the video visually features many bright colors with" → "The video visually includes the bright colors of"
"which had been a thing picked up" → "which was picked up"
"by saying: "We've heard" → "saying: "We've heard"
"Speaking about the creation of the video," → "Referencing the creation of the music video,"
"the band
tweeted that they" → "Walk the Moon
tweeted that they" with the wikilink
"of [the group's] favorite" → "of [the band's] favorite"
Done
ThedancingMOONpolice (
talk ) 06:56, 22 July 2020 (UTC)
reply
Live performances
Merge this with the next section since each is only one para and retitle to Live performances and use in other media
"on October 16, 2013." → "on October 16, 2013 by Walk the Moon."
"in the setlist of Walk the Moon's" → "on the setlist of their"
"The band played" → "That same year, the band played"
"It was performed live" → "It was performed live by them"
"The band performed" → "Walk the Moon performed"
"by the group on" → "by the band for"
"on September 25, 2015." → "on September 25 of that year."
"It was also performed at the" → "They also performed it at the"
"on November 7, 2015." → "on November 7 of that year."
"It was performed at" → "It was performed by them at"
Done
ThedancingMOONpolice (
talk ) 07:12, 22 July 2020 (UTC)
reply
Use in other media
I did suggest merging, but this should be a separate para once you have merged the sections
Add release year of the film in (brackets)
Target to
Paper Towns should be on "of the same name"
"titled "Subway Serenade" for" are you sure it shouldn't be "entitled Subway Serenade for"
The CNET article had the title of the video in quotes, which is why I used them.
"dancing and rhythmically" → "dancing, while rhythmically"
"While AT&T initially wanted" → "Though AT&T initially wanted"
Done all other fixes.
ThedancingMOONpolice (
talk ) 07:12, 22 July 2020 (UTC)
reply
Track listing
Retitle to Track listings since there is more than one
Done
ThedancingMOONpolice (
talk ) 07:23, 22 July 2020 (UTC)
reply
Credits and personnel
Done
ThedancingMOONpolice (
talk ) 07:23, 22 July 2020 (UTC)
reply
Charts
Weekly charts
Done
ThedancingMOONpolice (
talk ) 07:23, 22 July 2020 (UTC)
reply
Year-end charts
Annual chart performance for "Different Colors" → 2015 year-end chart performance for "Different Colors"
Done
ThedancingMOONpolice (
talk ) 07:23, 22 July 2020 (UTC)
reply
Release history
Label → Label(s)
Wasn't the initial release also
streaming ?
Remove target on EP
Done
ThedancingMOONpolice (
talk ) 07:23, 22 July 2020 (UTC)
reply
References
Archive all of these by using the tool
Copyvio score looks fine at 36.3%
Target Vulture to
Vulture.com on ref 2
Are you sure ref 7 is reliable since that's a tabloid?
Omitted the first two sentences of the second Background and composition paragraph for now.
Remove or replace ref 8 since that is a college newspaper so is not reliable
WP:OVERLINK of RCA Records on ref 13
Retitle ref 14 to Alternative Radio Future Releases
Remove Apple Music from the title of ref 15
Cite numerous countries for ref 16 to verify that the release was indeed various
Add the language template for ref 18
Target Billboard to
Billboard (magazine) on ref 22
Remove target on Billboard for refs 23 and 27
MOS:QWQ issues with ref 33
MOS:CAPS issues with ref 38
Remove Google Play from the title of ref 44
Done Except bullet 1.
ThedancingMOONpolice It appears as if you have totally forgotten about this section after responding to the other suggestions. --
K. Peake 05:10, 27 July 2020 (UTC)
reply
External links
Final comments and verdict
Changed some of my comments about the lead, but I am now ready to put this article
On hold until the issues are fixed. --
Kyle Peake (
talk ) 09:59, 21 July 2020 (UTC)
reply
ThedancingMOONpolice I was unaware you had completed the fixes since you did not mark the section as done initially, sorry, I will now ✓ Pass the article after using the Fix dead links tool for you. --
K. Peake 08:14, 27 July 2020 (UTC)
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