The text of the entry was: Did you know ... that the song "Catallena" by South Korean girl group
Orange Caramel interpolates a sample of the
Punjabi folk song "Jutti Meri"?
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What is a Catallena?
PizzaMan (
♨♨) 00:28, 26 June 2015 (UTC)reply
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Reunited after I reviewed your article "Lights" earlier this summer; will do this one tomorrow. --
Kyle Peake (
talk) 20:43, 25 July 2020 (UTC)reply
Thank you so much for taking up this review! Awaiting your comments!
--
Ashleyyoursmile! 07:53, 26 July 2020 (UTC)reply
Infobox and lead
Recording date is unsourced
Maybe the b-sides should be mentioned in the infobox?
Should the Korean title be in bold?
"is a song recorded by" → "is a song by"
"was written and produced by the group's long-time collaborators, Igy and Seo Yong-bae." → "was written and produced by both Igy and Seo Yong-bae." since introduction is not needed here when it's done in the body
"as the third
Korean-languagesingle (sixth overall)" → "as the group's third Korean-language
single and their sixth overall"
Shouldn't you mention that was digital download and streaming since there was more than one and this is the first?
"Musically, "Catallena" is a hybrid" → "Musically, the song is a hybrid"
"the trio is well-known for its" → "the trio are well known for their"
"In late 2013, the group's label," → "In late 2013, the group's record label,"
"announced that Orange Caramel was preparing" → "announced that Orange Caramel were preparing"
"On 18 February, the group" → "On 18 February of that year, the group"
"third
single titled "Catallena"." → "third single, titled "Catallena"."
Maybe you should mention around this point it was their sixth single?
Not done Any idea how to do that? A separate sentence seems a bit excessive here
I meant as in around this point of the para since anything written in the lead should be sourced in the body; maybe start the sentence with "However," --
K. Peake 13:57, 26 July 2020 (UTC)reply
"In addition, the video features cameo" → "In addition to the character, the video features a cameo"
"from another comedian" → "from fellow comedian"
"with the group coming to restaurant only to eat" → "with Orange Caramel coming to a restaurant, though they end up eating"
Mention that was while they were crying
I'm confused, why is the director referred as he; I though it was a duo and if one member in this context, do you know who particularly?
Not sure, the source doesn't mention anyone specific I did some googling in the meantime and came across
this link which apparently indicates both of them came up with the idea. Also, this is the entire interview, so could more things be quoted from it? --
Ashleyyoursmile! 13:18, 26 July 2020 (UTC)reply
Yes it should be used and that is a great find, but make sure you keep the other ref if anything written out from that isn't included in the new one. --
K. Peake 13:57, 26 July 2020 (UTC)reply
"Scott Interrante of PopMatters opined that" → "Interrante opined that"
"and "quirky" and wrote that" → "and "quirky," writing that"
"Taylor Glasby from Dazed labelled" → "Glasby labelled"
"trick" writing, " Not" → "trick," writing, "Not"
"The video was an instant" → "The music video was an instant"
"it garnered over" → "it had garnered over"
"from airing, for portraying humans" → "from airing due to it portraying humans"
"claiming that it" → "complaining that it"
Done All
Promotion and live performances
Retitle to Promotion
"Prior to the release, Orange Caramel" → "Prior to release, Orange Caramel"
"the making of jacket album photos" → "the making of jacket album photos for the group"
"of "Catallena" on" → "of "Catallena" for"
"on a weekly basis." → "on a weekly basis to perform it."
"performed the song on" → "performed the song during"
Done
Track listing
Good
Credits and personnel
Remove the members from being listed out separately under vocals, since not only does the source not mention them all individually but mentioning the group only is fine
Done
Charts and sales
Retitle to Charts, as I will explain below
Weekly charts
See
MOS:TABLECAPTION, add something like: Chart performance for "Catallena"
On hold for now, though be aware that I might have more comments after you respond to the suggested changes. --
Kyle Peake (
talk) 08:43, 26 July 2020 (UTC)reply
Kyle Peake, Thank you for your review.
I have mostly addressed everything, and have left a few comments for the rest. --
Ashleyyoursmile! 10:58, 26 July 2020 (UTC)reply
Ashleyyoursmile Great response time, but I have comments in response to a number of your queries. --
K. Peake 13:57, 26 July 2020 (UTC)reply
Kyle Peake, I have implemented the changes suggested by you. Let me know if anything else needs to be done. Thanks again for your time. --
Ashleyyoursmile! 16:23, 26 July 2020 (UTC)reply
Ashleyyoursmile Did some brief copy editing but I am now ready to ✓Pass the article, sorry for not replying earlier I was busy with family. --
K. Peake 17:28, 26 July 2020 (UTC)reply
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
Did you know nomination
The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as
this nomination's talk page,
the article's talk page or
Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
Comment: Two sources for ALT2 are in Korean, which have been translated using Google translate
Improved to Good Article status by
Ashleyyoursmile (
talk). Self-nominated at 06:15, 27 July 2020 (UTC).reply
Substantial article; meeting of GA criteria implicates DYK pass and article was nominated within 7 days of passing. Striking ALT1 and ALT2 as they fail C6 (hooks about works of fiction, which a music video is, must involve the real world in some way). ALT1 looks good, just removed some overlinking. I'll pass once QPQ has been completed.
Morgan695 (
talk) 21:33, 1 August 2020 (UTC)reply