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Hi! I will be doing the GA review for this article, and should have the full review up within a couple of hours.
Dana boomer (
talk) 22:42, 1 September 2008 (UTC)reply
There are several sentences in the "Origins" section that read like they were taken directly from a timeline. For example "Organized in January 1922 with Headquarters at Chapel Hill, North Carolina." and "Inactivated December 31, 1948 at Detroit, Michigan.", among others. Could you take a run through this section and try to merge sentences like these with the rest of the prose? I played with the first one I mentioned (in the first paragraph), so take a look at that. Feel free to revert or change it if you don't like what I did.
Same as the above for the first sentence of the "Cold War Years" section, with the sentence "Reorganized and redesignated on December 22, 1950 as the 411th Engineer Aviation Brigade."
In the "Cold War Years" section, you say "have been exposed to the Khamisiyah Pit demolition at the same time". First, could you explain a little more about why this is significant and what happened here? I had to click on the link to even know anything about what it was. Perhaps say something like, "have been exposed to nerve agents released during the demolition of Kamisiyah Pit". Also, what do you mean by "at the same time"? At the same time as what?
I have made tweaks to grammar, spelling, capitalization, punctuation and word choice throughout the article. Feel free to change anything that you like, but please just realize that if I changed it, it was because there was something that wasn't right in the first place and so something needs to be done. Let me know if you have questions about any of the changes that I made.
I am putting this article on hold in order to allow you time to deal with some prose issues. Overall, it is a nice article, but it needs a little work on the flow. Let me know if you have any questions.
Dana boomer (
talk) 23:05, 1 September 2008 (UTC)reply
Issues addressed. Does it look good now? I tried to make the sections more encyclopedic and performed a copy-edit on the entire article. -Ed!(talk)(Hall of Fame) 00:30, 2 September 2008 (UTC)reply
Very nice! Thanks for another quick response, and I am passing the article now.
Dana boomer (
talk) 01:28, 2 September 2008 (UTC)reply
Not sure if this is the right place... I changed Euphrates to Tigris river for the location of Al Bakir (Bakir Village). The village is directly on the Tigris, about 100 meters from what was formerly called LSA Anaconda, now "Joint Base Balad." —Preceding
unsigned comment added by
141.190.32.72 (
talk) 01:56, 28 August 2009 (UTC)reply
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